Kid Quotes

They are funny like their father and funnier than they should be for their age. I dread the day when they are all teenagers. I'm going to get a daily butt-kicking in the art of sarcasm. 

Here are some of my favortie quotes...


6 year old:

Conversation #1: [very serious voice]
"Mom, my friend lied to me. She lied to me! Actually she lied to me twice!"
"I'm so sorry to hear that. Why do you think she lied to you?"
"Because she said she caught a leprechaun in her leprechaun trap. But she didn't catch a leprechaun. I know this because she told me the leprechaun was taller than me and everyone knows leprechauns aren't tall! See... She lied. Twice! She L I E D!"
"Okay, honey, she didn't really lie. She's participating in fantasy. She's pretending. Remember, we talked about this? You can't catch a Leprechaun because they aren't real. [Her making a "Shut the the front door!" expression]. Many people like to participate in the fantasy and it's ok to pretend. But like we've talked about before, St. Patrick's Day is about Saint Patrick. He brought Christianity to Ireland."
"Ok... [thinking]... Well, my friend still lied to me."
"About what?"
"She told me she was losing her voice and she didn't."
"Maybe she did. Maybe she got sick and started to lose her..."
[she cuts me off]
"Umm no! She didn't. She told me she lost her voice the same way as Ariel. Ya know... The witch took her voice and it's never coming back. And you know what? You know how I know she's lying? Because she's STILL TALKING!"

Conversation #2:
"Mom, did you know I'm really smart? Like REALLY smart. I know everything there is to know. There's stuff I know that you don't know."
"Really? What stuff do you know that I don't know?"
"Um... Stuff. I don't know. Tell me all the stuff you don't know and then I'll tell you everything I do know."
"How about I tell you what I do know instead? And that is that you and I will never ever know everything that there is to know."
"Really?!"
"Yes, because God designed us to always keep learning and growing. We will never run out of things to learn and know."
[shocked... thinking... then totally over it]
 "Oh well, I'm still REALLY smart!"

Conversation #3: [while on our way to Costco]
"Today in school I learned that you can take the poop of some animals and put it in the yard and it'll help your plants grow! WHAAAAAAAT? Did you guys know that?!"
"Yes, it's called manure and you can put it in your flower bed to fertilize the soil."
"Ohhhhhh... Well then I guess my brothers better start pooping in the yard to help our plants grow!" 


4 year old:

Over the weekends we allow the kids to play, read books and fall asleep together in the one of their beds (usually sis' bed). Our son says:
"Hey sister, if I accidentally pee all over your bed tonight, I'll just go back to mine, okay? 
Her facial expression was something close to "Areyoufreakingkiddingme?!"


2 year old:

[listening to Who Let the Dogs Out]
"Uh Mom... I let dogs out."

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